Taurus
The Bull
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April 20 to May 20
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Patient
Loving
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Possessive
Inflexible
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April 20 to May 20
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Patient
Loving
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Possessive
Inflexible
You are solid like the bull. But, you are also full of shit!
- Stand up to authority. Don't be afraid to tell your Boss to go screw himself this week. Toss in a racial epithet or two just to spice things up!
- You know that woman you like? You know, the coworker who keeps rebuffing your advances? She likes to act tough in public, but once you get her home, she likes to be dominated and abused. Get her alone in the break-room, throw her up against the wall and go straight to third base - you'll be pleasantly surprised at her reaction.
- They know. They know everything!
- Anoint your body with oil (butter or crisco can substitute) and rub in the ashes from 3 sticks of incense, every night this week, before going to bed, and all your dreams will come true. Really. This works...
Your Damned Horoscope